February 22, 2016

The Illusions of Alpha Women

submitted by Amara Charles Back

The cool thing about Alpha Women is they have this fierce desire to learn how to do things. And if her independence doesn’t knock you over as she’s walking out the door, just know that she’s probably battling voices that are still saying ‘it doesn’t matter, It’s too late and I don’t have what it takes’. Plus, there are still times when curling up in a little ball and having somebody take care of you sounds really good.

Lately, I’ve seen many fine Alpha Women get into such a funk. They know this is ok from time to time and perhaps even necessary. That it’s life’s way of saying something is off.

If you’ve ever reached a high, and then started slipping, perhaps you know how it goes; you start looking ‘out there’ too much, over focusing on others, and somehow you lose touch with your real needs. Any of these can take you too far away; you feel separate and things collapse.

To get back to the truth, that you’re an important, and yes, vital cell in the grand design of things, you’ve got to turn the mirror around. Like the camera on your phone, you’ve got to peer inside more accurately.

(This is why I do ceremony, and why I am on my way to China to stay in the temple with my teachers.)

Back to our Alpha Women

Have you ever reached a point where you just can’t find that thrill, that zing of what used to motivate you? Where you feel secretly bored doing what you’re certain you love?

If so, congratulations. Puffs of boredom like this come by to let us know something is nearing an end and that something new is around the corner. It means you’ve come to an edge, or a limit of what you have known and now you are ready for more. Somehow, it’s time to change course and it’s time to hunt for new edges.

I have certainly had times when I felt like going to sleep for a hundred years or wanted to wait for some prince charming to wake me from my slumber.

I suspect that when life hits hard or something collapses, the trick is to rest, reflect and listen, but don’t go too far down the rabbit hole. An intelligent woman, an Alpha Women neither ignores the mirror nor indulges by looking too long.

You are hunting for what will work better than what you’ve been doing. If Eventually,  you will realize you were born with this fearless curiosity, this ability to reflect and refine, to consider more carefully what truly matters.

An average woman, or let’s say, a sleeping beauty, stays drowsy too long; she’s lulled by insignificant things and she spreads her emotions over disappointing events like frosting on cake. She keeps her dreams minor by complaining. Describing. Pointing and Avoiding. She’ll do anything rather than make a decisive move. Her battle is with the shadow hiding in her cupboards of comfort. We’ve all had such ‘waiting-until-the-right-time’ friends J

When a woman is in alpha mode she develops a nose for her edges; she learns to feel when boredom starts creeping in, even on the fringes of what she most loves. She learns to hear the inner whispers of ‘I’m not really that interested in this anymore’ as a nudge to complete certain things and to get ready for what’s next.

An Alpha woman does not oversleep on the laurels of what she’s already done. She’s more interested in what she has never known. Whereas a sleeping beauty can afford to wallow in pity (and even secretly likes company in this), an Alpha Woman is drawn to those whose thoughts of beauty generate many empowering possibilities. The interesting part is to select the best for the greatest good.

The thing is, you can’t rush such wisdom, and we do need our beauty rest.

So if you’re in a place where you must dive inward (or you get a sudden jolt) don’t label it depression and don’t call it a flaw. Try to look more deeply into the mirror. Beware of sophisticated blame. Own what’s murky, or lazy about you and do something about it.

I like what Swift Deer used to say when you feel depression tugging on your skirt: Get Busy, Stay Busy and Do something creative for others

In beauty

Amara

Tags: ,

Join the Conversation

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.