Imagine a World Without Flirting
As the #MeToo movement inspires more and more people to share their stories of sexual harassment and assault, it’s hard to refresh our browsers fast enough to see the latest revelations on sexual violations. But what happens to the natural and healthy aspects of flirting, and is it still possible in today’s climate to flirt with safety and respect?
I think many of us are sitting back and reevaluating experiences in our past. How can you not? We’ve probably all been there to some degree or another, feeling uncomfortable…or worse. Because of this, I think it is imperative that men and women have honest and open conversations about consent and boundaries regarding what is and what is not ok when it comes to flirting.
Something magical happened in Prague. As we presented the first Quodoushka in the Czech Republic, we felt in the people this hunger for the ceremony that brought our gathering to such a profound level of beauty, honoring respect, and love between the men and women.
It happened that we had very few men in the group, and after a gorgeous ceremony celebrating feminine beauty, there was no time to include the men. So the next day, one man expressed his deep disappointment with such honesty and heart, it changed the whole direction of the workshop.
I told this beautiful gentleman of a dream I had in the night where a man asked me to release a poison that was stuck in his head. As I pressed it out of his head it came out roaring like a rocket. So we decided in the moment to create an honoring ceremony where eight women shared the gifts she felt men bring to her, and then each man expressed what women bring to him. It was indescribably beautiful. We were all weeping in gratitude.
Here is one man’s way of sharing what happened for him:
I want to share in more detail how powerful the “Honoring Men” ceremony was for me. It is important for me to write this but I also hope that what I write sparks some magical memories of the time we shared at the Q in Prague, 2017.
I like inviting the soft burn of yearning love to come out from hiding. Even the most bruised and tender spirits, the ones who’ve just about given up, the ones who feel tired of losing, or who don’t even know they’re caged in pain; these are the ones I love lifting. Actually, it’s we who do the lifting. It happens every time.
I like when we become healers because it’s safe to shine. I like when we get to the place where sex is no longer about me and what I want, or what I can get. I like when our sexuality stays fragile, and private and clear. I love when there is no difference between my pleasure and your pleasure. I love the moments when giving is so thrilling, so sweet and so divine, nobody is left out.
Regular sex, the kind you have behind closed doors, is still my favorite kind of sex. Ah, but there’s something very different when we get together to explore our sacred sexuality. And it isn’t what you may think.
Natural Awakenings published my latest article: Crazy Habits of Dharma Love.
Oh my Goddess Helen. You are so beautiful. You body flows on the wings of your heart. I cannot wait to see you at the November Quodoushka in Kauai.
Dance for me again and again, will you?