During the month of September, I will be discussing different aspects of sexual wellness and how it can improve your quality of life. Being that sexual wellness is such a broad topic, I think it’s best to start with discussing self-care, as it is an integral part of sexual wellness – allowing us to focus on ourselves and what our basic needs are, first.
What is self-care?
Self-care begins with self-love and centers on making your health and happiness a priority. To do that, you must first remember that you deserve as much attention as the ones you take care of around you. Identify what your needs are and nurture those areas of your life. Taking care of yourself will make you happier and better able to care for others.
Here are some ways you can incorporate self-care seamlessly into your daily life.
Eat colorful foods
Colorful fruits and vegetables are naturally packed with vitamins and minerals that our bodies need to function optimally. We tend to choose foods based on their taste or convenience, but that may not be what’s best for our bodies. Take an extra 10 minutes to make your lunch so you can choose healthy, nutritious food to keep you fueled throughout the day. Give yourself permission to go to the farmer’s market on Sunday instead of the grocery store. Not only will this be good exercise, it will give you a chance to switch up your routine and have a more interactive experience with the food you’re purchasing.
Take a walk
“Going for regular walks is one of the best and easiest things you can do for your health,” says Melina B. Jampolis, MD, author of the new book The Doctor on Demand Diet. Even light exercise causes your body to release endorphins and elevate your mood. Not only will a simple walk improve your mood, you can make this a social activity by incorporating a friend or a partner. In fact some of the most powerful executives conduct walking meetings because they understand how activity fuels creativity and a sense of camaraderie while walking and discussing business. Or just figure out time to include a walk, whether it be on your lunch break, perhaps adding a little walking commute to your day, or taking the stairs instead of the elevator.
Revisit an activity you enjoyed
Many adults find it hard to keep up with hobbies when most of their day is spent working and fulfilling responsibilities at home or with family. I’m not advocating for neglect of personal responsibilities, but it is possible to find 30-60 minutes a day to do something solely for yourself. Eliminate time you may have spent scrolling social media or watching reality TV and replace it with an old hobby. This can be as simple as giving yourself a manicure or buying the model airplane kit you loved putting together as a child.
Design sex into your life
In my book, The Sexual Practices of Quodoushka, I explain in-depth how you can design sex into your life. Engaging in safe sex is beneficial for your physical and mental well-being. When our relationship choices are clear and everything is working like a series of green lights, it’s easy to find time and opportunities for sex. When our energies are out of balance, it becomes easy to think that perhaps we don’t have the time or opportunity to have sex like we want to. Mostly, we don’t have sex because our internal energies are not in tune. Take some time out of your day to listen to yourself and hear what your body and soul desire. What type of sexual encounter today will feed you? Is it time for some self-play? Perhaps your desire is to fantasize?
Doing this will help you connect to yourself on a deeper level and will open up your inner channel to pleasure. Enjoying sex is a wonderful way to distress and flush cortisol out of the body which is a sure fire way to de-stress, while helping you connect to you. The act of passionate sex reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes, and blemishes. The sweat from passionate lovemaking and the release of increased amounts of estrogen produces a cleansing of the skin pores and makes her skin glow.
Self-care looks different for everyone! What works for you may be different than what works for others. Get in touch with your true desires and find what will make you a the happiest most authentic version of yourself. Your loved ones will thank you for it!