January 30, 2013

I wonder about my breasts

submitted by Amara Charles Back

Jane Zawski wrote:
I looked at your video with great interest.  I have below A-size breasts and what I have sag and have stretch marks on them.  The pink areolas and nipples are ok, but, really, I don’t think my breasts are beautiful.  I’m sure there are many of us mothers out there with such breasts.  I’ve looked, but can’t find pictures of other breasts like mine and women who love these little, scarred protrusions.  I am just writing quickly because I have just a moment, and would love any thoughts and you to point me in the right direction (same for my saggy upper and lower stomach, below which muscles are actually visible from my yoga practice, but the sag and stretched, marked skin won’t ever go away, I guess).
Love you,
Jane

Amara wrote:
Dear Jane,

You have been on my mind all day. Perhaps I made this video for you. I know many women do not love their bodies or their breasts. This is why I made the video, I made it for women like you and me, who must learn to love our bodies.

When I was a young girl. I fell in love with my camp counselor and I used to love letting my eyes linger and stare at his skin when he wasn’t looking. I loved every pore of his face, and I was fascinated by the deep grooves, crevices, lines and marks that sprawled across his cheeks, and nose. I used to study and remember every indentation, and I remember ( this was 40 years ago!) I absolutely adored the marks on his face as if they were the signatures or calligraphy of a fine painting.

Then, a few years later I saw him again. The glow of summer camp had faded long ago. I zoomed into his face as I did as a girl, but now as a young woman, my brain registered wrinkles, and deep pockmarks! The very things I loved stroking my eyes over he must have hated or thought odd. Such are the eyes of an innocent girl.

This is exactly why I made the Beautiful Breast video, because it is the way we use our eyes that matters; especially the way we see ourselves. We can look at our bodies, or others with love and we will see beauty. Or we can look with muddy eyes, cruel eyes, and eyes full of judgement. Then what we see becomes ugly.

Your Breasts Are Beautiful

A favorite poem by Hafiz goes something like this
CHANGE
What is it you would change?
Your face?
Your eyes?
(Your Breasts)
Why would you change these things?
For if you change
Your face
Your eyes
(Your breasts)
God might might not recognize you.

I know few of us have breasts like the ones in these pictures. You see, it’s not really important to change the lines or shape of things, for that is not where beauty is.
Love is the only thing that can change the shape of things, for love is a feeling. It’s a vibration that creates the shape of what we see.

So you must not approach your body or your self with the idea that you must change anything, because nothing is wrong.

Now, this being said, I know that seeing ourselves with muddy eyes is not an easy thing to let go of. I know we want to feel and be seen as beautiful. But trust me, this must first come from inside you. You must find different eyes to see yourself.

Beauty is a vibration of love. It’s first a feeling of self acceptance, saying to your self, ‘okay, I am what I am.’

When you do this, if you can you look at your self with kinder eyes for a just a moment something curious cam happen. Try to see, try to look at your breasts before your mind has a chance to sink a dark arrow into what you see.  You can suspend those dark arrows of judgement against yourself by having a little bit of awareness.

You need to pause first and look at what you see without thinking. You will notice your self looking at your breasts. This is the secret to turning your eyes inwards, to turning the darkness of not liking yourself into a moment of directly seeing what is really so. These tiny pauses of awareness turn into light arrows of self acceptance.  As you do this again and again your inner eyes meet your outer eyes, and they become kinder and kinder until your gaze for yourself turns into a warm fire of self love.

I cannot promise you will get rid of every line and groove, but I can say if you love yourself again and again your eyes will change, and your body will feel different.

This is the secret of beauty, because if you do this for long enough, the shape of your body will shimmer with beauty. Beauty is a vibration that when you feel it, it can be seen by others. This is really why I created the Yin Way video, so you could create this vibration of love inside you.

I know many women do not feel their breasts are beautiful. I do not have the breasts of a model, but I love them. I had to be told many times by my lover that my breasts are beautiful. I couldn’t hear those words, especially about my breasts, for a long time. But gradually, I began to feel this love, curling inside me like a wisp of smoke. I knew I had to do this often, to practice loving myself, caressing myself with this nourishing love until I could feel love sinking into my skin and my mind. Maybe some are born with this kind of love or beauty, and it’s easier for them to feel. But maybe some of us have to grow and tend to our bodies like a garden in need of water and sun. This is why I also believe that breasts need to be nibbled and licked, and stroked until we can get used to this vibration and know that it is good.

You are beautiful Jane.

In beauty,
Amara

Yin Way Breast Exercise

Yin Way Breast Exercise. Now available.

p.s. with your permission, I’d like to post this so others can begin to feel this vibration of love inside themselves.
May I?

Jane wrote:

Dear Amara

Thank you for your reply.  I’m thinking a lot about what you’ve written and I appreciate it.

Yes, please share with others whatever you wish.  What you wrote is beautiful.

Thanks again –

Jane

Yin Way Breast Exercise

for beautiful breasts that shimmer with love from the inside out.

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Consuelo Morin says

I think the main reason they are attracted to women who are more than 155 lbs… is because most of these women have breasts that are larger. When women are under these weights, the large majority of them have DD or smaller breasts (naturally). Yes, I know there are lots of exceptions… I had 32DDD breasts while wearing size 6 jeans as a freshman in high school! (And now I’m in size 24 pants with elastic, with size 36K!) BTW hubby likes me just fine… And he is tall and chubby, and I love his body too!

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When a woman faces her partner in the woman on top position, he can enjoy the sight of her breasts or he can hold them as they make love. He can caress her back or enjoy feeling her buttocks. And to add an extra dimension to their sex, the woman can experiment with different hip movements, perhaps switching between riding his penis and rotating her hips in a circular pattern.

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Ladies, you need to love what you have. Magazines and TV are constantly revolving around digital manipulation and/or artificial breast implants. Whilst a woman might think she’d feel better with these fake alternatives, there really is no healthy gain out of it, confidence-wise or not. Remember, while your breasts may not be what “Hollywood” claims all women should be, it could be a whole lot worse. You could be unfortunate enough to have to have your breasts removed entirely due to breast cancer – but let me just add that there is NOTHING to be ashamed of in that situation. If anything, I salute you for your pain, strength and effort to overcome the battle of breast cancer.

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Ladies, you need to love what you have. Magazines and TV are constantly revolving around digital manipulation and/or artificial breast implants. Whilst a woman might think she’d feel better with these fake alternatives, there really is no healthy gain out of it, confidence-wise or not. Remember, while your breasts may not be what “Hollywood” claims all women should be, it could be a whole lot worse. You could be unfortunate enough to have to have your breasts removed entirely due to breast cancer – but let me just add that there is NOTHING to be ashamed of in that situation. If anything, I salute you for your pain, strength and effort to overcome the battle of breast cancer.

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You should try doing this activity every day for you to feel the full benefits of this technique. When you do this every day you will notice the huge difference in your daily energy levels. You will be much more energetic and focused throughout the day because there will be no negative energies disrupting your routine.

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You were raised conservatively. The American media inparticilar are outright prudes. Photos, ads or film of breasts, nipples, G-strings and ass are taboo (you guys are behind the rest of the world, grow up!). You follow a religious group that teaches sex is bad. ‘Born again’ Americans think gays are evil … get over it! Homosexual hearts are no different than yours. You were raped or abused. You are afraid of masturbation. You dislike your body. You don’t feel safe. You don’t remember the last time you had sex. You DO remember the last time you had sex! You’re uncomfortable expressing who you are. You don’t KNOW who you are. You’re afraid to show your feelings. You’re angry, jealous, insecure, shy, afraid… You’re a virgin. You’re dead!? You’re an alien.

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Helen says

Jane – thank you for the courage to share your thoughts and concerns. Just like you, I also have small breasts, and I fear that one day they will be wrinkly and sagging. Amara – your response is so spot on. Learning to love oneself, every inch of our bodies, with lines and wrinkles….letting go of our own judgement, and beauty and vitality would come naturally. Thank you for sharing these pearls of wisdom.

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Amara says

Helen, You are such a beautiful woman in every way! Thanks for helping spread the love, starting from way inside and rippling out. Who knows what we can do? There’s nothing more powerful than boundless love.

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Gaylyn says

Wow. Thank you Jane for your transparency and vulnerability! When I was a budding maiden, I kept waiting for my body to become “womanly”…I made it to an almost A and that was it. I grew up a dancer and eventually spent 20 years in the martial arts, training and teaching and guess what, it was actually an advantage as an athlete. I eventually had three sons and nursed them a total of 10 years…the men in my life accused me of nursing so long because I actually had cleavage! Once I thought I would have implants, but I grew into a knowing that natural is my way…I now have biopsy scars, and am lopsided a bit…I am 57, in great shape, but aging…what an adventure life is! I love my body, it is my home, I love my little breasts…I can orgasm with nipple stimulation, they bring me wonderful pleasure…I don’t personally find “paid for perfection” bodies attractive…I admire the extraordinary in the ordinary…Amara is so spot on, beauty is a vibration. I worked with women of all ages and shapes and sizes for the past 10 years in the fitness world…the most beautiful women in my club were perceived as “chubby”, it was their love of life, their sensuality, the ability to be joyful in their skin that was crazy attractive…hmmmmmm.
It is time we as women redefine beauty, it is time we stop limiting our definition of beauty!
Let’s be mirrors for each other…let me show you your beauty….

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