What would happen if you allowed the men in your life to love every bit of you? Can you imagine having men who wish to provide whatever they can; able to take you into realms of pleasure that thrills you to the bone? Can you picture the kind of guy who’s turned on every time he makes just the right move at just the right time?
Here’s what I’ve noticed about certain men:
When given the right kind of clues, they’re absolutely eager to delight us.
But why do men seldom succeed as much as they could? Why do they frequently fall short, leaving things unsaid and untouched? And why do they so often seem clueless, asking us what we want?
In my experience, training a man to catch our signals of desire is a matter of learning how to inspire him rather than asking for or demanding what we want. Yes, we can ask, and sometimes even demand that he steps up or slows down. But there are better ways to inspire men to love us the way we’d like to be loved.
First, keep in mind what inspires men most, especially during sex… They like seeing the pleasure in our bodies. So, if we want to inspire him, we must be willing to let go; letting our body, our voice, our eyes, our heart – everything lets go.
The real reason men speed too fast is because we do. If you luxuriate in your own pleasure, and you allow him to watch your pleasure, I assure you, he will follow your lead.
Now, how often have you asked a man to do something only to be frustrated that he didn’t listen, or he forgot or even did the very thing you asked him not to do?
If this happens, rather than focusing on the disappointment, your task is to focus on your own openness. Instead of reacting with frustration or irritation when his timing is off or he’s too self- absorbed, the trick is to relax instead. This is how you inspire a man with your openness.
It’s no secret men love to feel free, and that they often bristle at being told what to do – especially by a woman. So pay attention to how you ask for what you want. Is there a hidden agenda? Are you too attached to the way you expect things to be done?
The way to bring out his best is to relax into your beauty. I’m not referring only to putting on sexy clothes (although this may certainly inspire him too), I also mean to relax your speech, your body, and your heart.
In your speech, practice asking for what you want without demanding anything. Say more beautiful things about yourself and others; notice beautiful things, focus on creating beauty around you until beauty seems to show up wherever you go. Give sincere compliments. Find something, anything he’s doing well. When you appreciate his efforts first, his ears will be more ready to hear what doesn’t work.
One of the most important secrets to letting a man love you is to cultivate the feeling that “I deserve pleasure. And I am worth it”. No man can love you the way you’d like to be loved unless you first begin, little by little, to love yourself more.
What makes you shine most brightly— this is what men find irresistible — is a kind of selfless shine. If you are selfish, jealous or greedy, this is what will show up in the men around you.
A selfless shine is a luster that emanates from a woman who’s like a sweet peach ready to be picked; it comes from a woman whose spirit is happy. She has a kind of erotic glow that gives life to his dreams and so she does not need to ‘get’ men to do anything.
When a woman nourishes her Shakti this way she will be surrounded and supported by men who do the same. It’s a profound pleasure to inspire men’s greatness by being someone worthy to protect, provide and create for.
Quodoushka 1 consists of transformational shamanic sexuality teachings and guided exercises to bring more care, quality and passion into your intimate life and is a way to practice articulating what you want. Join us for our upcoming Q1 in Santa Fe, NM on July 14 – 19, 2019. Learn More >